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Drizzt
Joined: 07 Mar 2005 Posts: 1081 Location: Easington, UK
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Posted: Wed Sep 26, 2007 9:03 pm Post subject: 'Pathfinder' **probable spoilers** |
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Anyone seen this advertised on posters in Tescos and Asda? It's one of those movies which secretly bypassed the cinemas and went straight to DVD.
In essence, it's the tale of a boy. A Viking boy. He's found in the wreckage of a longboat by Native Americans and, guess what, they take in the boy and raise him up good and proper and he's got the hots for a nice wee girlie. Awwwww...
But wait, the proverbial is about to hit the fan... these big fellas in beards with horny helmets are landing intent on conquest and murder and just about any other cliche you can come up with. Nasty Vikings, these lads. Shocked yet?
So, nasty Vikings turn up and so their best to cause some trouble by attacking the local Native Americans with abandon. Quite often in slow-motion, too. Oh woe. Alas. Who will save the goodies?
You can probably guess that our young hero (played by Karl Urban, the chap who was Eomer in LoTR) steps up and it goes on, and on, from there...
Ok maybe, maybe, if you can ignore the glaring historical inaccuracies and some of the downright idiotic moments, and you're legless drunk, this may not be too bad. There's plenty of action, predictable and dumb though a lot of it is, and there is some FANTASTIC scenery on display (mountains, lakes, forests - some of the cinematography is brilliant).
Aside from that, it's awful. The story is an old one which has been told a million times before a million times better. The script is downright sackless at times, none of the characters are developed beyond the bare minimum and, though it is just a rehash of an old story, it offers nothing new and lacks any subtlety or skill.
I think what happened is some chap saw 300, decided he could make a similar type of film, and chose Native Americans along with Vikings at random. I can only assume they then researched and used every stereotype ever conceived about Vikings and Native Americans and through as many at the movie as they could (horny-helmet-wearing murdering marauders on one side, baa-baa-ing primitive innocents on the other).
In a nutshell (ok, way too late for that) it's crap. Avoid it. Disown friends who buy it for you as a gift. _________________ Pagan Music |
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Mantyluoto
Joined: 21 Sep 2005 Posts: 573 Location: Somerset, UK
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Posted: Wed Sep 26, 2007 9:09 pm Post subject: |
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*hangs head*
just bought it....... *waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa* |
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Tk421
Joined: 06 Jan 2005 Posts: 275 Location: United Kingdom
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Posted: Thu Sep 27, 2007 10:18 am Post subject: |
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and there's a bit of wonder why it never hit the cinemas?
Should we be ashamed to be in asda and tesco when they have those posters too? _________________ "Right so we're going to steal a bomb that can be remote detonated, take it back to our base and then huddle around it? That sounds like a great plan." |
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